Catch and release

We here are M&C, Inc., have adopted a certain policy that I thought I'd mention just briefly. You may have noticed that we are not CNN. Nor are we Defamer. (I'm kind of glad we're not Perez Hilton, because he's getting some bad press lately, perhaps rightly so.) We at M&C, Inc., expect that we're not your only virtual source for gossip and attitude. We figure that you, our readership, are probably (at least some of you) surfing as much as we are. So, our policy on the big stories is kind of an Opposites Day catch-and-release, by which I mean: If the story's too big, throw it back.

Like, the whole thing with Mel Gibson? Seriously -- that's been covered. (MSNBC has an entire section of their Celebrity news devoted to it.) What do I have to add, other than "Shut up, Mel. No, seriously, shut up." Which -- consider my disgust added, in spades and in triplicate.

And then there's the latest national passtime: Spot Suri Cruise. Which I know that I should be engaging in whole-heartedly -- except doesn't it just feel like we're still being manipulated into giving Tom the one thing he thrives on? Our attention. (Since all other human appetites are denied him.) Staring in horror at the TomBot and his bride hasn't helped anything; it just makes him preen. So, let's just stop, shall we? Let's shun, at this point.

Admittedly, I will be shifting celebrities to my Spoooooky List one by one as they swear oaths that the child exists and shower her with contractually-obligated superlatives (Jada and Penelope, I'm looking at you), but that's just updating my celebrity rolodex really. That's just looking ahead to the time when Hollywood and all of humanity must square off on opposites sides of the Kodak Theatre as Suri and Grier catfight over our collective souls. That's just good planning.

In the meantime, I'm going to recommend we all look away. At least until such time as there are actually photos of the baby. Come on!