AAOOA #3: Luis Tosar

I don't normally recommend choosing a celebrity boyfriend based on one film. That's like buying an album for the one song you like. It can go very badly.

But what if you like two songs? What then? I figure you buy it.

And if it also turns out that an entire country (in this case, Spain) already has a crush on the guy, you can trust your instincts on this one. Even if, the first time you spot him, he's wearing the most elaborate mutton chops this side of the Civil War.

Thus it was for me and Luis Tosar, who had been completely unnoticed by me until Unconscious. It apparently premiered briefly with acclaim, but didn't come to my attention until Netflix stepped in. If you happened to be an English major in the last twenty years, this movie lets you finally use your knowledge of Freud for good and not evil. And you will laugh giddily while doing it.

You will also think, Catch me, I swoon! Despite (or maybe because of? I don't know your id) the mutton chops. You will think,
Here is the only reason to watch Michael Mann's Miami Vice.

But is it necessary to expose yourself to Colin Ferrell just to confirm a crush? I'd recommend Flores de otro mundo as a second song, instead. It lacks unpleasant Irish thugs and absurd facial hair, and with that good view of his face, I realized who Luis Tosar reminds me of -- George Clooney.

I know, I know -- but in a good way. Not in a "dating women he should probably be dropping off at day care" way. (Well, at least as far as I can tell -- my Internet Spanish is poor.) Rather, I mean, he has that same way of looking at someone. That held-breath pause, where his face is still but the eyes are longing, regretting, hoping, despairing, desperate but not yet daring. You know, how Dr. Ross used to look at Nurse Hathaway.

Yes, Clooney can still do it now, but first of all, you'd have to timeshare him with the Fug Girls (if they'd let you -- unlikely), and secondly, you'd have to accept some responsibility for Leatherheads.

Luis Tosar only has his side project, The Ellas, to apologize for. Search your conscience, people. I think you'll make the right choice.